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OMG I am in such a foul mood. The weather here in Chicago is horrible. It's not so much the rain itself (temperatures are not too low) but the commuting, unsuccessful shopping, and being quasi-stranded in it that make me angry. And here I was thinking that there is nothing worse than unsuccessful shopping in the rain, but no! I check scores and see that Justin Verlander gives up four runs in the first inning against the P.O.S. Cardinals. Could there be something worse than that? Oh yes. INTENTIONALLY WALKING ALBERT PUJOLS NOT ONCE, BUT TWICE. I'm mad because Verlander didn't wimp out against Jim Thome last week, not that the White Sox had any lead nor is Albert Pujols the same entity as Jim Thome. I was led to believe that Verlander is THE TRUTH (nickname by Rod Allen, who for unknown reasons I started following on Twitter), but shit, I saw FALLACIES when I last checked the box score.

I refuse to check any more box scores today, though maybe I'll check things at midnight. I like Joe's method from back in May where he would close Stat Tracker in disgust and fall asleep, and then would wake up to great things for his team.



...But you know I still love Justin.

Photos of the Day: 5/27/09

Today's theme is, "I can't even know what to say."*

This does not look right. Jimmy Rollins looks like he's missing a leg here.

I like it when animals are incorporated into baseball, especially when there's a showdown between humans and non-human animals. What are the eagle and A-Rod thinking?

What could have been said to provoke Erik Bedard's facial expression?

Ichiro is caught stealing a base. There should be a name for this kind of tag out. OWT? CROTCHOUT? COCKSHOT PART THREE**?

So we all know about Carlos Zambrano going absolutely berserk today for a call at home plate. I guess I like this picture because it looks like God (invisible) is intervening by picking him up from the back of his jersey to try to force him to calm down.

God failed. I can't believe that ball he threw went all the way to the bleachers? Was that for real? This is the kind of tantrum a very young child may or may not throw, depending on the parents. The fact that this facial expression is on an adult is out of control***!

*This is a Mariah-Carey-ism, not me being an ESL speaker.
**This is a Lincon Park High School c/o 2002 reference, the video for which I cannot find right now; sorry to those who haven't seen it.
***To keep up with the Mariah-Carey-ism theme†, the proper denotation for "out of control" is "OOC." See track 11 on her most recent album, E=MC², for more information.
†If you don't like the Mariah Carey and baseball combo, I understand. However, it's not an entirely random connection, as she did date Derek Jeter, with whom she reportedly bonded over being biracial. I'll try to minimize the Mimi allusions, but this is just how my brain works.

Just Sayin'

I know I over-love on Casey Blake, but here he is on the front page of ESPN MLB. He's been everywhere, recently, and I'm super proud. IOWA! Just want to say that Third Base or Bust / Ladies Love Us were early on board "Ship Go! Casey."

I should be Casey Blake's publicist. If only he could lend his former team mate Grady Sizemore a bit of his hitting magic. Spread it around, boys.

Anyway, am very much looking forward to Kei's photo wrap up and Joe's weekly beast review. I can't believe it's not Sunday and that a new week of Fantasy is upon us. Congratulations to all for making it through one whole cycle!

Week 5 Matchup: Ladies Love Us vs. The Poppersteins

The Marauders of Time's best, non-robotic teams are up against each other this week--Jenni's Ladies Love us and my Poppersteins. I intended to set this blog up as a place where I can vent about the weather postponing my TIGERS vs. WHITE SOX games (that's about 90% of my lineup) and most importantly, pour out my hatred on arbitup. But those days have passed, at least for now, and I have been relatively calm as of late. Last week I nearly swept the commissioner's team, and this week, I am up against Jenni, who has similar managing techniques as me. Our teams are well-managed in that we love our players through thick and thin, and independently of our fantasy commitments (at least compared to other managers, from what I can figure). I think we serve as exemplary fantasy owners and I want to see our teams dominate this league.

Today, at the Rangers vs. White Sox game, a family sat behind us and at the start of the game, the little girl wouldn't stop asking "WHERE'S WAHN OORIBAY?" After her dad ignored that question, she yelled, "I WANNA SEE NICK SWISHER!" Good call, little girl. Ladies Love Us is definitely collectively handsome, but I think what really makes me love them is the addition of Nick Swisher. I can't find any photos, but Swisher was recently ejected from the game for arguing a called strike. I follow Swisher's Twitter, and later that night, I saw this update:


These are the little but awesome joys I look forward to in Celebrity Twitter. In addition, he has pinch pitched a scoreless inning, blessed our economy, and Lil Wayne thinks that the explanation for all of this is that Swisher is an alien (this is how Lil Wayne explains his own greatness, or "greatness," your pick). To me, Swisher is the behind-the-scenes-glue to Ladies Love Us, even if his batting average this week is .059 and he starts left bench next week or some other week in the future.

In other Matchup news, it seems like both Jenni's star players ("manager's pet[s]," perhaps) are not doing all that well, and the same goes for me. Miggy was doing good earlier this week but has succumbed to the powers of power-pitching. I was counting on Jorge (believe in yourself, Jorge!) and Carlos to do some work like they did last week, but so far, not too impressive. On Ladies Love Us, it looks like Grady and Robbie are in a bit of a slump. But then these non-manager's pets are coming up, saving the day! Casey Blake and Adam Dunn are working some magic for Jenni, and BRANDON PHILLIPS for me. Six of Phillips' RBIs are from one game. But now he's down with the flu. Imagine he had the swine flu? I forgot to think about pitchers more carefully, but we know how beautifully things went down today.

Anyway, there are still two big days left. I am currently taking many categories, but a lot of them are really close. Ideally, it'd be tied and we'd own the league together. But with Nar's Hit By Pitch, i.e. HANLEY, going nuts, hmmm. We'll find a way!

Side by side

To follow up on Jenni's latest post, I put our shutout pitchers side by side to capture the fantasy moment:

Beautiful.

By the way, look at CC's pants as they are cut off in the picture! I knew he was following the hammer-pants-trend.

Against All Odds, Casey Blake Saving Ladies Love Us

Casey Blake has heretofore been known, at his worst, as "Most Likely to Strike Out" (see below) or alternately, "Most Likely to Walk and Then Get Batted In by Manny Ramirez" at his near-best. But I love him (and I don't have any viable way of removing him from my lineup), so on we go together, through bad times and mediocre times and really, really bad times.


This week, though, Casey Blake is saving the Ladies Love Us batting average from sinking below .200! Look at those non-contributing Yankees! Nick Swisher COULD NOT BE WORSE! I would have been better off starting GRIFFEY.

Anyway, although he failed to save the Dodgers' winning streak, Casey Blake really killed it tonight. Look at him almost mauling the Natinal's catcher as he slides into home plate.



He looks like a Mortal Kombat character. IOWA PRIDE! Love it.

The Dodgers are my second favorite baseball team and I have to say that it was really sad to see them lose tonight. It sucks that tomorrow morning everyone will be speculating about how bad they're going to get without Manny Ramirez. But whatever, haters can hate...the Dodgers will be fine. And Casey, even if you don't get another hit this week, I promise not to make another joke about how bad you are until next Monday.

xx